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How
can I ask anyone for help? What could I possibly give in return?”
In my work both as a psychotherapist and national speaker, I hear
this sentiment expressed too often by parents of children with
ASD. Many adhere to the unfortunate belief that in reaching out
to others for support, one must be able to give an “equal”
amount in return. Perhaps they have never fully understood the
gift bestowed on others just by making a request for assistance.
Before
advertising your job opening, you need to create a comprehensive
job description. In part, a job description defines specific duties
that meet the unique needs of your child or young adult. But a
good job description also reflects the philosophy and personality
of your family and the individual who will best fit within it.
It
is 8:10 on a school day morning. Your husband leaves early for
work. Three kids must be out the door by 8:30 and you also need
to leave for work by 8:45. For the past 45 minutes, your 13 year
old daughter has taken sole ownership of the only bathroom in
the house. Your 10 year old son frantically searches for his school
project while he insists that you help him find it. And if that
is not enough, your 7-year-old daughter who has a developmental
delay, sits on the floor of the kitchen having a major meltdown
because there is no more of her everyday cereal left.
Rain
Kids Newsletter Article
1 (8/96) | Article
2 (4/97) | Article
3 (4/98) | Article
4 (5/99)
Today,
my heart is breaking. Yesterday I attended the funeral of William,
a 14-year old boy who lost his life, two weeks after the start
of his freshman year. This was a quirky, brilliant, sensitive,
caring, funny, in-your-face kind of kid, who loved to sail and
play golf, and dreamed of being a pilot. William had many interests
and kept his family hopping with grand new schemes. During the
service his dad shared that had it not been for his son’s
intense prodding, they would never have bought that old used Bayliner
boat. Boating became a regular and joyous family event.
Parenting
an older adolescent with ASD sometimes feels like walking a tightrope
extending through thick clouds to unseen horizons. Parents must
find a workable balance between being appropriately protective
of that older adolescent, while also letting go to promote as
much independence as possible. All of this occurs without the
benefit of a roadmap to, or the fast-forward capability to foresee,
your child’s future. But there are definite skills to aid
us on our parenting journey: proactive planning; accepting what
we can’t control; listening to our kids; and believing in
possibilities.
For
many years, people have showered me with compliments about my
strength in facing personal challenges. In truth, I often feel
overwhelmed and isolated. Something happened recently to help
me realize that opening the door to ask others for help may be
the most effective coping strategy I can develop.
“The
phone rang. I was unearthing the contents of a box amid a formidable
wall of moving boxes, yet to be opened. Having just moved from
out of state, we knew few people locally. I wondered who could
possibly be calling. I answered the phone, expecting a “wrong
number.” To my dismay, it was the family day care provider
where I had left my two-year old son, Jordan, less than an hour
before. She insisted I come pick him up immediately, as he had
been crying inconsolably for the past forty-five minutes.
Exceptional
Parent Magazine, June 1997 Raising children can challenge any relationship. How do you find time together, just the two of you? Couples parenting a child with a disability may seem at even greater risk. As a counseling professional and an "exceptional spouse" in my own right, I find that most such couples have stronger - not shakier - commitments to one another simply because they must intentionally create time together and "make it work." (Download this article - .PDF format 90 Kb)
Living with Parkinson’s disease (PD) presents challenges; being a parent with the disease raises another set of issues. Approximately 10 percent of the 1.5 million people with Parkinson’s are below the age of 40. Many of them are in the midst of raising their families. Talking to your children — or even grandchildren — about PD is an emotionally charged, but necessary, task. Patients and professionals agree that understanding is the key to acceptance and moving forward as a family. (Download this article - .PDF format 183 Kb)
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Autism
Asperger's Digest Magazine, September/October 2008 issue
Autism
Asperger's Digest Magazine, January/February 2007 issue
Disability
Solutions: A Resource for Families and Others Interested in Down
Syndrome and Developmental Disabilites, Volume 7, Issue 1, Spring,
2006.
AAPC
Newsletter, Winter 2006 (pp. 2-4)
AAPC
Newsletter, Fall 2006 (pp. 6-7)
AAPC
Newsletter, Spring 2006 (pp. 6-7)
The
Autism Perspective, Winter 2006, Vol 2 Issue 1
New
Hope for Parkinson’s Program
Copyright © 2011 Lisa A. Lieberman, MSW, LCSW, all rights reserved.